Friday, October 05, 2012

Catch Up Mode

I've gotten so far behind in writing, I'm going to make these reviews short.  I mean, really, who of you 4 or 5 readers wants to sit and read 9 long movie reviews right now?  I'll even skip the burger pics so as not to make it look too long.  I promise to maybe never get this far behind again 

Movie Review #29: The Avengers 

The Avengers. It's what we call ourselves, sort of like a team. "Earth's Mightiest Heroes" type thing.

Per the rules, if I buy a movie that falls in a part of the alphabet that I have already reviewed, I have to watch that movie right away.  It wasn't that hard of a task.  Honestly, this is now my favorite movie ever, A title  "From Dusk Til Dawn" has held for a very long time.  What can I say?  This movie was everything I wanted and expected when Marvel started making great movies beginning with Iron Man.  It was a perfect superhero team film and I have absolutely nothing negative to say about it.  And you know what, a TON of people agree with me based on how much it made.  10 out of 10 burgers

Movie Review #30: The Black Cauldron

Oh, I'm sorry. I've ignored you. You did come for the Black Cauldron, didn't you? Good. Then climb in! It will only cost you your life. 

This is the movie that changed it all for Disney.  As far as the movie is concerned, this really isn't a good thing.  This ended up being one the Disney's biggest financial failures for an animated movie of all timeAt the time, it was the most expensive animated movie to make ever and it didn't make back that money.  A major revamp followed and it led a few movies later to the revitalization of  the company with Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast.  I remember liking it as a kid, but seeing it now, I see why it was a failure.  Generic heroes, generic villains, and a sub-par plot make this a pretty sub-par movie.  It's not terrible, but it just doesn't seem to have that Disney magic.  4 out of 10 burgers

Movie Review #31: Black Swan

I felt it. Perfect. I was perfect. 

That line, the last line of the film, sums up how I feel about this film.  When I first saw this film, I was so moved by how powerful this film was, I couldn't stop thinking about it.  Although multiple viewings make it lose the tiniest of  luster simply because the shock of what happens no longer surprises, it is still a spectacular film.  Natalie Portman is at her absolute best and totally earned every award she received.  The story is equally amazing and by the time the last act hits, I found myself breathless.  Such a great film.  9.5 out of 10 burgers. 

Movie Review #32: Blade

 You give Frost a message from me. You tell him it's open season on all suckheads. 

This was a really good entry into a really good trilogy of movies.  Although not the best of the bunch, it was a really fun movie that I can still rewatch without being bored.  Wesley Snipes is as badass as ever and if not for New Jack City, it might be his best role.  Stephen Dorff is also great as the villain and the film does a good job of making an action film out of a horror genre.  The best was yet to follow.   6.5 out of 10 burgers

Movie Review #33: Blade II

You obviously do not know who you are fucking with! 

The high point of the Blade trilogy is simply a great film.  It increases the action of the first film but behind that is really impressive story that is a lot deeper than the standard action movie.  It also has a great bunch of supporting characters that really complete the film.  I'm a big Ron Perlman fan and he is as awesome as always in this film.  But again, it is the story and the emotion behind it that really makes this film so great and makes it easily my favorite of the series.  7.0 out of 10 burgers

Movie Review #34: Blade Trinity
So, can we just go right ahead and sign you up for one of our secret Nightstalker decoder rings? 

The third film in the trilogy, while good, is the weakest of the series.  In fact, it is a pretty basic action film with little emotion and a lot of stuff blowing up.  Even Snipes seems to be over these movies.  So why isn't it a total bomb?  Ryan Reynolds and Jessica Biel.  Biel is amazingly hot in the film and totally believable as an action star.  Reynolds is at the top of his game in the humor department and it as if he took his role from Waiting and decided to just start hunting vampires.  It is these two that make the film more than just a generic action film.  They make it watchable and even fun despite the weak script.  6 out of 10 burgers

Movie Review #35: Blair Witch 2, Book of Shadows

We brought something back with us... 

I'm not really sure why we don't own the first Blair Witch as I really like the film.  It creeped the hell out of me.  The sequel was an obvious cash grab due to the success of the first film, but I liked the first one enough to run and see the second.  Despite being generally hated by most people, I actually don't think it is that bad.  Although centered in the Blair Witch universe of the first film, I really don't think it has enough in common to be considered a sequel, but I think it is adequately creepy on its own.  Just don't call it a Blair Witch film.  5 out of 10 burgers

Movie Review #36: The Bone Collector

I gave you so many clues and you failed

I absolutely LOVE serial killer movies like this.  It's fun to see all the clues come in to place and see the detectives figure them out one by one in order to try to figure out who the killer is. This is another great one.  Now, I wouldn't put it quite on the same level as my personal favorites, Seven and Copycat, it does a really good job of being creepy and thought provoking at the same time.  Denzel is his usual cool self but his role as a handicapped person seems to lighten his demeanor a little more than usual.  Jolie is great in her role too, before she achieved worldwide celeb status.  A fun movie if you are in to that sort of thing.  7 out of 10.

Movie Review #37: Boondock Saints 

Never shall innocent blood be shed, yet the blood of the wicked shall flow like a river.

While I don't carry the same enthusiasm as any other people on this film, I think it is a good movie.  While others consider it their favorite movie or one of the coolest films of all time, I see it as a pretty entertaining film that came out in a time where Pulp Fiction was still in the back of everyone's mind and the cool, foul mouthed, anti-heroes were still all the rage.  Don't get me wrong, I do like it, but I don't put it in the same class as many others.  It's fun though.  It has a pretty good story.  The characters, while WAY over the top, are definitely unique.  It all adds up to a pretty good film.  Maybe not a great film, but a serviceable one.   6.5 out of 10 burgers


Mom said...

I have to say you did pretty good in condensing the reviews but don't do that it again. I love your longer reviews and I love seeing the hamburgers.
Avengers and Black Swan are definitely the bests of the bunch reviewed. I can't say I remember Black Cauldron at all. I think I might have seen the first Blade movie but not sure if I have seen the others and don't really remember the first at all. Boondock Saints I know I haven't seen even though we own it. I think we have the first Blair Witch, Heaven only knows why. That movie scared the shit out of me. Are you sure it isn't your movie? Bone Collector was good but definitely love Seven better.
Please don't get behind again.

laura b. said...

I have actually seen only 3 out of these 9 movies! I liked Boondock Saints for what it was...I agree with your take on it. I haven't seen Bone Collector for a long time, but I do remember liking it too. As for Black Swan, you are not alone in praising it...not at all. But for some reason I totally didn't get it.
I'd definitely like to see The Avengers at some point. Thanks for still reviewing. I know it is a lot of work!

Tara said...

I know I have seen "Black Cauldron", but can't remember any of it. Alas, it has been awhile since I've seen it.

"The Avengers" was really good, I need to add it to my DVD collection and watch it again.

Oh, and I LOVED "Copycat"! That was an awesome serial killer movie. Harry Connick Jr. was so good in that film.

Jessica Valle said...

The Avengers - I'm with you, one of my favorites! So much fun!
Black Cauldron - Have I ever seen this?
Black Swan - Loved it!
Blade, 2, and 3 - A fun, enjoyable series. Plus Ryan Reynolds without his shirt - be still my beating heart!
Blair Witch BOS - I don't think I've seen this since the theater.
Bone Collector - A great movie. I also really enjoy puzzly movies like this.
Boondock Saints - Never seen it, although I should, to see what Darryl sounds like with an Irish accent...