As long as it doesn't come in threes....

Today is quite possibly, the worst day of my life. Two bombshells were dropped today. First, I took my dog, Orko, to the vet today because he had a lump. As it turns out, the vet thinks it is a tumor and needs to be taken care of sooner rather than later. He said because of the location, size, and sudden onset, it will have to be done by a specialty surgery center. I called and for a rough estimate, it looks like everything might cost us around 3 grand. We might still go in for a consult, but it doesn't look good for our boy.

Not an hour after finding this out, we got results that we were dreading. As readers of this blog know, Jess and I have struggled with infertility for many years now. Well, surprise, surprise, Jess took a pregnancy test on Monday and she was pregnant. The blood work on Monday afternoon confirmed it. But, because of some slight bleeding, we were carefully optimistic as she might have been having some trouble. The only way to find out was to take a test 48 hours later and see if her numbers were going up or going down. Down, was of course, a bad thing.

Scared, but hopeful, we have spent the last 2 days as a couple who were expecting. We talked to it. We touched it. We gave it kisses, all the while telling it to not leave us and promising that we would be wonderful parents if he/she just stuck around.

A while ago, still reeling from the news of our dog, we found out that Jessica's numbers were in fact going down and had suffered a miscarriage. After trying for this long and to have our hopes that high, this is devastating. Words can't really describe what we are going through right now. We had an absolutely horrible 2008 for all intents and purposes and had hopes that 2009 would be so much better. On Jan 5th, we were on cloud 9. Today, January 7th, we see that the year we had last year is just continuing...