Ok, I guess you deserve an explanation for yesterday's post. Well, I guess I don't really need to say and I could keep it to myself, but hey, that is what a blog is for right. Then at least you can see where I am coming from in the future.
Yesterday, Jessica and I found out the artificial insemination we were trying for the 3rd time failed. We have been trying to have a child for 4 whole years now and have obviously had zero luck. A few months ago, we met with a fertility specialist and decided on artificial insemination. The insurance would pay(well, 50% or so) for 3 cycles. Well, this was our last try and we have not been successful. We could do it again and pay for it, but the studies show that after 3 attempts at it, it probably won't be happening. So yesterday we came to the conclusion and final realization that we will be without a child in our lifetime. No celebration of Mother's or Father's Day in our house. No child to teach how to do things. No child to look at and say, "That child is a part of us and we created him/her." No child to kick a soccer ball with and everything else that comes with a child of your own. We see crackheads everywhere having kids. People who can't even care for themselves having kids. People who DON'T want kids having kids. And yet, a couple like us, a couple who wants nothing more than to have a kid and raise him/her in a good home can not and will not have one. Jessica will never get to experience the job of being pregnant. I will never get the opportunity to talk to her belly. And it is just not fair. Screw it all.....
8 comments:
I know that right now there isn't much anyone can say to make either of you feel better. But I'm so sorry for the extreme disappointment, frustration and sadness you two must be feeling.
The only advice I can think to give is to take a break from it all for now and then maybe try again with other methods.
We have a family friend who had given up getting pregnant, so she adopted some kids. Then soon after she did get pregnant and they're doing fine.
I kind of thought so.
I agree there is a lot of shit out there that have kids and abandon them, mistreat them (or worse), or just neglect them. You and Jess should maybe, possibly consider adopting..just a thought.
I know a brother and sister that were adopted by a nice suburban family and they both grew up well and very appreciative of their situation collectively. They both turned out really well and loving o=f their parents.
So sorry to hear that things haven't being working out... but you are so right about kids having kids when they don't want them.. and druggies and parents that should know better but don't care or the child is abused.. Alot of shit out there.. but don't let that stop you both from having a child, whether its biological or adopted.. adoption can be a good thing.. you both would awesome parents...
Your post, your obvious pain, breaks my heart. I'm sorry for the loss of your hope and can only wish you peace with what has been handed to the two of you. I don't know you know you, but I can tell from your blog that you are wonderful people who deserve every happiness.
I'm so sorry. Your post made me cry. It is not fair. Of course it isn't fair. There is no fair in life. If there was "fair" so many things would be different. You deserve a child and I will still pray that a miracle happens. Sometimes they do happen. I don't know what else to say. I am so sad. Hugs.
I'm so sorry to hear that. You guys would be the perfect parents.
There is a blogging couple on my list who had tried for 10 years to have a baby with many failed IVF attempts. They finally got pregnant and she's due in the next month or so. So, there is hope.
There are no words my darlings, I'm just so sorry. You;re right, It's not fair and this really sucks, but there is always hope. Sometimes it is the only thing that can get you through.
I love you!
Just take it easy. I care enough about you to not slather you with platitudes.
But!! I will give you both cyber hugs.
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