Another midnight post. When I actually become a writer I should try doing this in something other than vampire hours. Before I head off to watch hours of old wrestling thanks to WWE on demand (gotta love cable) and Pride fighting DVD's (by the way Cassie, considering your a fan of UFC ya might wanna check those out sometime. I might have recommended it before but I am old and forget things.) here is my thinker for the night.
WHO made you?
I have only recently really discovered what I believe to be my identity. What I noticed about my new found knowledge is that I am a whole lot like other people than I thought I was, thus the whole who made me question. This is what I could come up with.
I am my Dad............I am way to sarcastic for my own good. I keep weird hours at strange times that makes me very much a loner. I can be so silent about important things in my life, but give ya small talk up the you know what. I write down lists for everything to help me keep order in my day. I can lay down and do absolutely nothing but watch TV for hours ( by the way he can get away with it now. I'm 28 I have no excuse). I yell in my car when I am all alone to people who will never know that I am yelling at them.
I am my Mom............I can listen to anyone about anything and keep an actual conversation with them. I save the world without recognizing that I am exceeding my own limits to what I can actually do to help. I know there is so much more to life than worrying about every little thing to the point of paranoia. I have no problem telling someone I love them to there face just so they can go on with there life knowing I said it at least once. If it's important enough then I find a way. I am bad with money ( don't tell her I said that.). I know that it's fun and important to just take off and take a vacation to myself and leave the rest of the world behind cause silence is golden.
I am my brother......I loved basketball first and last. I play video games and have to conquer them. I walk just like him. I started wearing cologne to copy him. I still get hand me down clothes from him. I don't need a girl just for the sake of having a girl. If it's no one's business then they just won't know about it. He is the only person I ever strove to be better than cause if I was better than him I must be the greatest of all time.
I am my friends.........I play poker. I collect shoes. I wear jerseys. I have a big ego when it's necessary to compete. I listen to more than just rap music. I wanna teach. I wanna train. I wanna sell. I laugh at the dumbest things. I am something different to everyone I know.
I am her..............I know what it really means to care now. I know that I am just suppose to know cause I am. I know there is more to it than just saying "I Love You". I write cause of her. Anything connected to destiny fate or some other higher power stepping in comes from knowing her. I take risk and face fears cause of her. I get angry then move on cause of her. I can express genuine emotion and not feel like an absolute wimp. I listen to music differently. I have mastered the art of the mixtape. I read between the lines way too often. Movies make me cry. I remember exact dates. And then I celebrate them, even if it's by myself. I care about someone more than I care about myself. I can overcome a lot more than I ever thought I would have to.
All this being said I am now struggling to find what the hell I added to the mix. Besides liking pro wrestling I am not able to find anything else that I did to make ME. Guess I will keep looking.
In case you all never hear it from me again. I love you all. even you Manuel. Rabble Rock!
5 comments:
That was a fantastic, intelligent, well thought out, touching post, Rich. By far your best effort yet.
I agree, nice post.
We are, every one of us, the Gesalt of our influences. You have added the ability to combine these different influences into a new whole. Each of them by themselves could never comprehend or integrate what you have combined within yourself. It's in the process of breaking down the barriers between our influences that we Become.
cheers
Rich,
That was, and this is not meant to be cheesy, but that was such a beautiful post.
And occasionaly I watch Pride Fighting, but I haven't gotten to into yet probably just because UFC is on all the time, but I am looking forward to Liddel fighting that guy from Pride, his name escapes me all of a sudden...Mandelai Silva I think
Yeah, great post Rich. I especially like this line, "He is the only person I ever strove to be better than cause if I was better than him I must be the greatest of all time." Very touching. You're a hell of a writer...
Rich, that was very touching and moving. I cry too all the time, and this post had me on the verge of tears. You can tell that you love your family and it was the same saying that Manuel liked that almost brought me to tears. You say you are not sure what else has made YOU, but I think this writing is you. Keep it up Rich - I love you too and who you are!!!
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